Wedding Planning Help: Who Gets a Gift?

As your wedding draws near, you've undoubtedly felt a glimmer of anticipation at the thought of the mountain of gifts you are likely to receive from guests and well-wishers on your wedding day. Kind of makes you feel like a kid at Christmas time, no?

But what about all those fine folks to whom you, as the bride and groom, need to give gifts? Yes, that's right - in case you've forgotten, apart from being the recipient of gifts as your wedding approaches, proper etiquette requires that you'll need to give a few, too.

Put your most gracious foot forward and show your appreciation to every individual who deserves it with our clear-cut gift giving guide. Read on to ensure that you don't overlook anyone who should be on your gift list. And if you start feeling a little frustrated and exhausted at the mere thought of having to shop for gifts, worry not -- we've got some excellent tips and ideas which will take the guess work out of gift giving, making it much easier than you likely ever imagined it could be.

Attendants

Tradition requires that you acknowledge each of your bridal party attendants with a thoughtful gift of appreciation for their time, effort, and participation. This means you will need to purchase gifts for the bridesmaids, groomsmen, ushers, honor attendants, flower girl, ring bearer, page boys if you have them, junior bridesmaids, and anyone else who is part of the bridal party. Remember that the members of your bridal party incur costs, invest time, and sometimes even work hard to be a part of your wedding - a gracious bride and groom knows to treat them with kindness and gratitude. Check the SuperWeddings Store for some terrific attendant gift ideas. (Photo Copyright © 2001 German Silva)

Unfortunately, in this busy hustle bustle world, more and more couples are forgetting about a very special set of people who are very deserving of gifts of love and appreciation on the wedding day - their parents! Children of all ages sometimes have a habit of taking their parents for granted and failing to appreciate them. Regrettably, many couples make this same mistake even at a time as special as a wedding. It is traditional to present your parents with a gift of appreciation on, or very near, your wedding day - and it is also an important show of consideration and respect. Don't be neglectful - honor them with a gift which communicates the affection you feel for them, and let's them know that they remain an important part of your world, even now, that you are all grown up and starting a brand new life as a married person. Click here for ideas. (Photo Copyright © 2001 German Silva)

Good manners require you to present a gift of appreciation to any individual who has been thoughtful, gracious, and generous enough to host a celebration in your honor. This includes events like engagement parties and bridal showers, as well as any other gathering at which you are the honored guests. You can approach this in one of two ways: Bring along a gift to present to the host/hostess either when you arrive at the event, at some point during the festivities, or at the conclusion of the celebration; or, send a gift, along with a note of thanks, immediately following the party or shower (no later than one week after). Either way, be sure to verbally thank your host/hostess for his or her hospitality and kindness on the day of the event as well.

At any wedding, there are bound to be people who have gone out of their way to provide their assistance, or who have given generously of themselves, either at your request, or without ever being asked. Of course, we are not referring to hired service providers who are being paid, but rather, to Aunt Sally who insisted on baking your wedding cake. Or your crafty cousin Katie who enthusiastically agreed to help make your bouquets and floral decorations. Or your mother's best friend Maimie who offered to arrive at the reception hall hours before the event in order to put her decorating talents to good use. These helpful souls are all well deserving of an expression of your appreciation, so select a special gift to let them know their effort and kindness has not gone un-noticed.

You may have certain extra-special guests at your wedding who have earned this title either because they have put in considerable effort to be in attendance, or because they hold a very special place in your life or in your heart. It may be fitting to express your fondness for them by honoring them on this very special day, just as you will do for your parents. Your old room mate and her husband from Detroit, who have driven 2000 miles in sweltering July heat, may be worthy of a welcome gift when they arrive. Think along the lines of a gift basket or a bottle of wine. A childhood nanny who holds a special spot in your heart, a special aunt or uncle, Godparent, or grandparent.... All of precious people may be worthy of a gift which says "you matter" on this important right of passage in your life. (Photo Copyright © 2001 German Silva)

Wedding guests get gifts too? You bet! They're called favors, and they are small token gifts traditionally given by the bride and groom to say "thanks for taking the time out of your busy lives to be here on our wedding day!". You'll find a couple of suggestions for these a little further down, but you'll want to visit our Wedding Favor Ideas section for a whole slew of terrific ideas, and browse the favors in our store too!

Had you thought of that? Don't feel bad if it hadn't occurred to you - sometimes we are all so oblivious to the obvious! It's not uncommon for couples to get so caught up in all of the "ins and outs" of wedding planning, that they forget this is a gift-giving occasion to be shared by the two of them!

But then, the big question... What in heaven's name do you get for the love of your life on this most important of all occasions? Many brides and grooms struggle with this very dilemma. Of course, it has to be something extra special... and very romantic... but somehow the ideas just don't seem to flow.

Your gifts to one another should be of a very long lasting nature - something with solid 'keepsake' value. A pair of socks or some kitchen gadget may be fine beneath the Christmas tree, but you'll want to shoot for something with a little more impact on your wedding day.

At the end of this article we'll tell you where you can look for some wonderful gift ideas of this calibre, but first - let us offer an idea which we truly believe can not be surpassed... If you really want to make a statement with your gift to your beloved, here is the perfect solution which will aptly demonstrate the magnitude of your affection for them...

You can have a star named after your sweetheart as a wedding gift for them. Yes, an actual star in the sky. "Sure", you are thinking, "If your last name happens to be Rockefeller". You would indeed think that something as 'out of this world' as this would cost a minor fortune to accomplish, so it might surprise you to learn that it can be done for a mere $48. For years, The International Star Registryhas been naming stars for celebrities and dignitaries across the world - the likes of which your sweetheart can now be counted among! Perhaps you may recall an episode of the NBC television show "Cheers!" which actually featured one of these Star Registry certificates. Now you can have this done for the person you love as a unique and utterly unforgettable gift.

So what do they receive to prove that there is really a star in the sky which will bear their name from this day until the end of time? A 12" x 16" parchment certificate, available framed or unframed, which includes the name of the person you have named a star after, the dedication date, and the telescopic coordinates of the star. They'll also receive an informative booklet with charts of the constellations plus a larger, more detailed chart featuring the star you've named for them, encircled in red. Because these star names are copyrighted with their telescopic coordinates in the book, "Your Place in the Cosmos," future generations will be able to identify the star in the directory, and using a telescope, locate the actual star in the sky! What could be more perfect for the person who is the star in the story of your life?

Its important to add that as perfect as this gift is for the one you are marrying, it really is the gift of a lifetime for anyone you think the world of. You might consider naming a star after each of your attendants, or honoring your parents by naming stars after them. Imagine how thrilled they will be when they find out about this on your wedding day.

Regardless of who you have deemed lucky enough to name a star for, if it is in honor of the occasion of your wedding, you might want to consider having the master of ceremonies announce this during the speeches and toasts at your reception - then just wait for the impressed and astonished gasps of delight and approval, the "wow!"s, "ooohs", and "ahhhhs" from everyone in attendance. It truly makes for a remarkable moment.

As an additional aside, some people name a star after each of their children - or the special children of someone else - to honor their birth, christening, birthday, graduation, or other special occasion or milestone. Its also a very meaningful way of letting children know how special they are when creating a blended family through your new marriage. And as you might imagine, it serves as a wonderful gift for an anniversary or even an engagement, for special people in your life as well.

The internet has simplified and added convenience to our lives in so many ways, and no where could this be more true than when it comes to the challenge of hunting down special gifts for special people. There are some terrific online retailers who offer a remarkable selection of gifts for every recipient on your wedding-related list. While brides and grooms in the past had to struggle to find something perfectly suitable for those they needed to give gifts, today, with a click of a mouse, certain retailers are able to present them with a fabulous source of creative and unique gift giving ideas - the sort of items which tell the recipient that you put extra thought into selecting something extra-special for them.

We highly recommend the online retailers listed below for your gift giving needs. You'll be astonished by the imaginative, beautiful, and sometimes highly personalized gift options each of these stores has to offer. If your problem has previously been that you drew a complete blank when it came to gift ideas for your wedding party or other special people, the only challenge you will perhaps face now is having so many wonderful options to choose from for each individual, that it makes it difficult deciding! We're very selective in the recommendations we make, and have hand picked each of these for this guide:

Personal Creations
Unique, and highly personalized gifts. If you've been struggling in your search for attendants gifts, we can almost guarantee that your search will end here. You'll also find a world of ideas for your parents, helpers, and even eachother. Personalization adds extra meaning to a gift, and makes it one they will always remember.

Things Remembered
Another source of exquisite, very personalized gifts to suit any budget, and any recipient.

Mikasa
An exquisite selection of gifts available in every budget for bridesmaids, special people, or party and shower hostesses. Buying on-line, direct from Mikasa, will save you up to 65% off of retail prices.

Illuminations
A fabulous collection of options for bridesmaids, hostess gifts, helpers, and the other ladies on your list. Gorgeous candle sets, candle holders, gift sets, and more in every price range. You'll also find some terrific favor finds for all of your wedding guests here if snoop through their site sufficiently - for example, pretty floating candles in various shapes and themes which you can wrap in tulle and present to each guest at the reception. If you need more help with favors visit the SuperWeddings Wedding Favor Ideas section and our online store - we'll get the ideas flowing faster than water, and point you in the right direction.

UncommonGoods
Product by Uncommon Goods A unique mix of inspiring and truly uncommon gift ideas in price ranges which suit every recipient. Although some of the prices can be "up there", we found one idea which would suit any budget and make an unbelievable special favor idea: Angel Coins (shown at left) - Wrap in a pretty piece of tulle, tie with a ribbon, and give one of these beautiful emblems of hope to every wedding guest as a wedding favor to keep the spirit of angels with them. While the currency of fate may be unpredictable, legend has it that Angel Coins will bring watchfulness from above. Napoleon reportedly carried an angel coin in his pocket until he lost it the night before the Battle of Waterloo.

Ross-Simons

Product by Ross Simmons A slightly high end store, but if you are on a budget you'll often score some fabulous finds during their clearance sales. We found a set of $50 crystal candlesticks for $9.95 - perfect for a bridesmaid or as a hostess gift. The wine basket at right would make a sensational gift for a shower or party hostess - At half price it was just $9.95 when we went looking!

Hallmark
From Hallmark Hallmark on-line offers shopping convenience and selection. Often a good source for reasonably priced hostess gifts (send a cookie bouquet, tin of gourmet cookies, flowers, or a scented candle) and gifts for the bridesmaids (pretty photo frames, candle sets, or collectable). The photo frame and candle set pictured here would make lovely bridesmaid gift, and at about $15 it's easy on the budget.

Internet Florist
Flowers, gift baskets, potted plants and other festive offerings. The perfect solution for a hostess gift - it'll reach her the same day you place the order! Another idea - surprise your parents on the morning of your wedding with your thoughtfulness and the delivery of a bouquet of flowers! (Guys can do this for their bride!). Experience great selection, quality and convenience from a knowledgeable florist -- satisfaction guaranteed.

Linda Kevich is a recognized wedding expert, and the creator and editor of SuperWeddings.com. She has been a professional wedding consultant for over ten years, and now teaches the business of wedding consulting through a distance education program she developed and administers. Since the year 2000, she has trained and mentored hundreds of wedding consultants around the world in successfully entering the wedding consulting profession, and is setting a standard for excellence in the industry.