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Linda Kevich Interview The St. Petersburg Times - June 2003: The Modern Bachelor Party Linda Kevich talks about bachelor and bachelorette party trends with Leonora LaPeter, reporter for the St. Petersburg Times in St. Petersburg, Florida

St Petersburg Times: What is the purpose of the bachelor and bachelorette party? Linda Kevich: Originally, the bachelor party was known as the 'groom's supper'. Friends of the groom would gather with him the night before the wedding to essentially mourn the loss of the freedom he enjoyed as a single guy. By all accounts, there were no women or X-rated entertainment involved in these gatherings - just the guys hanging out together, one last time. St Petersburg Times: And how has that changed over time? Linda Kevich: Over time, this tradition evolved into the 'bachelor party' as we have come to know it, which was intended to give a guy one last opportunity to 'sow his wild oats' prior to tying himself down as a married man. It became an excuse for raucous behavior on the part of the groom and his friends - sort of his last taste of freedom. Today, however, bachelor parties are no longer necessarily wild and crazy events. For many guys, it's really just an opportunity to unwind with friends and calm the pre-wedding jitters many grooms-to-be experience as the big moment draws near. St Petersburg Times: It is my understanding from talking to wedding planners that the bachelor party has become tamer and the bachelorette party has gotten a little wilder. Based on your knowledge, would you say that's true? Linda Kevich: It would be fair to say that, as a general trend, bachelorette parties have become somewhat wilder over the years, while bachelor parties have moved away from kind of debauchery which they were associated with in the past. I think this has a lot to do with societal changes pertaining to the traditional roles of men and women in recent decades. St Petersburg Times: What might the reason be for this, and what else have you noticed? Linda Kevich: Women today are more independent, and they stand on equal footing with men more than ever before. They are now just as likely as men to pursue important careers, hold powerful positions, and command the same earning ability. Its no surprise, then, that they are more likely to assert their equality when it comes to something like their groom's bachelor party or their own bachelorette party. Today's bride-to-be has no interest in sitting around sipping tea knowing her guy is out for one last hoorah. The attitude of the modern day bride is, 'If he's going to do it, there's no reason why I shouldn't do it too!'. Correspondingly, the fact that we are seeing a trend towards considerably tamer bachelor parties is also very much related to this change in attitude among today's young women. When faced with the fact that his bride-to-be is going to indulge in the same kind of fun as he might be anticipating for his last big night out as a single man, a lot of guys find themselves re-thinking the types of activities they will engage in. When the shoe is on the other foot, many men get a little uneasy or downright jealous of the thought of their bride-to-be frolicking with male strippers, or flirtatiously dancing the night away with other men. So, instead of heading to strip clubs, or otherwise partaking in a night of heavy partying and X-rated entertainment, many men are opting instead to get together with their buddies to take in a sporting event, have a quiet dinner out, or spend the evening playing cards and perhaps reminiscing about some of the wilder times they've had in days gone by. And in most cases, that suits their brides just fine! Since I began my career in the wedding industry in 1991, I've dealt with hundreds of to-be-weds each year, and what has struck me is that couples are now consulting with their mate more in deciding how the bachelor or bachelorette party will be handled. With women in today's society being much more assertive than ever before, they are very capable of letting their man know if there is something they don't approve of. Likewise, men today are much more likely to view their fiancée as an equal partner than was the case in previous eras, and they are more likely to respect and honor their concerns, instead of over-riding them. And so, when it comes to the bachelor party, they feel it appropriate to modify their plans to avoid indulging in something which would be offensive or upsetting to the woman they love, respect, and are about to marry. You might find it interesting to note also that something else which has become *very* popular in recent years is the combined bachelor-bachelorette party. Many brides and grooms are still interested in one last big celebration before they tie the knot, but they are finding that they can have just as much fun by bringing all of their friends together to party alongside one another, instead of going their own separate ways. Overall, where both bachelor parties and bachelorette parties are concerned, the raunchiness with which these celebrations were once approached is gradually being eased away to a great extent. Ultimately, the way these parties are handled today depends a great deal on the personalities and lifestyles of the particular people involved. By no means do they necessarily imply a certain type of behavior any longer. The way an individual celebrates their bachelor or bachelorette party today is often pretty consistent with the types of activities or behavior they would otherwise engage in when they are looking for a fun time with friends. Generally, the behavior is no longer any where as extreme as some might expect. St Petersburg Times: What are the most common themes to bachelor and bachelorette parties that you hear about? Linda Kevich: Just as people are becoming much more creative at expressing who they are with the types of weddings they are having, they are also taking a more personalized approach to the themes behind their bachelor and bachelorette parties. They often plan bachelor or bachelorette parties which are a reflection of where their interests lie, or of the things they like to do. So, a bachelor party these days might involve an evening at a casino, golfing, fishing, a barbecue and a game of touch football at the park, or attending a professional sporting event - whatever activities the particular group of guys enjoys. A bachelorette party might be as simple as dinner at a trendy hot spot, attending a concert by a favorite group, a day at the beach, or indulging in a slumber party where the girls paint each other's toe nails and hire a masseur to give them each massages. Of course, for those who still crave a slightly rowdier experience, it frequently entails a night of club hopping (with either a designated driver or hired limo). To keep things lively, friends of the guest of honor will often require them to pose for pictures throughout the evening with attractive members of the opposite gender, or will ask members of the opposite gender to sign an article of the bachelor or bachelorette's clothing to give them something to remember the occasion by!

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